“I invited my in-laws for dinner but not one ate the food I had cooked”

Query: I had invited my husband's family for Diwali. They all came but none of them ate the meal I made and it was really embarrassing. I later found out that my mother-in-law cooked a large meal and fed everyone before they arrived at our place. Should I say something? What should I do next year?

It's understandable that you felt embarrassed, but it's important to address the situation with sensitivity and open communication. Here's what you can do.

1. Have a private conversation: Talk to your husband about the situation to understand why his mother cooked a meal before coming to your house. This will help you both gain insight into the situation.

2. Communicate with your in-laws: Consider having a respectful and non-confrontational conversation with your mother-in-law to express how you felt. Share your perspective and inquire about her intentions.

3. Plan together: For future occasions like Diwali, discuss and coordinate plans with your in-laws to avoid such misunderstandings. You can plan potluck-style meals or alternate hosting duties.

Encourage the idea of spending quality time together as a family, rather than just focusing on the meal. This can help shift the focus away from the food and reduce such incidents in the future.

Be open to compromises and flexible arrangements that work for everyone involved. It's essential to maintain a positive and harmonious family relationship.

By addressing the issue calmly and respectfully, you can work towards a solution that prevents similar situations in the future and ensures a more enjoyable Diwali for everyone. Hope this helps, feel free to book an appointment with us for further such queries.

Dr Rachna Khurana Singh is a consultant at Mental Health & Behavioral Science, Artemis Hospital, Gurugram. She is a relationship, Lifestyle, and Stress Management Expert. The Director at The Mind & Wellness Clinic. New Delhi.

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