Things couples should discuss before getting married

​​10 things couples should discuss before getting married​
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​​10 things couples should discuss before getting married​


Marriage is a major milestone in a couple's journey, marking the start of a lifelong commitment. While love and affection are fundamental to any relationship, a successful marriage requires more than just emotions. To build a strong and lasting partnership, couples should engage in open and honest discussions about key aspects of their future life together:

by TOI Lifestyle Desk
How would they like the wedding to be
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How would they like the wedding to be

Many times, couples fail to discuss their dreams and expectations about the kind of wedding they would like to have-- be it low-key or lavish. This can lead to disappointments and grudges later, which some people hold on to for many years.

​​Financial expectations​
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​​Financial expectations​


Finances are often a common source of conflict in marriages. Couples should talk about their financial situations, including income, debt, savings, and spending habits. It’s essential to establish how money will be managed, whether accounts will be joint or separate, and how to budget for future expenses.

​​Career aspirations​
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​​Career aspirations​


Each partner’s career ambitions can greatly influence the relationship. Discuss your career goals, potential job relocations, and how you plan to support each other’s professional dreams. Understanding and respecting each other’s career paths is crucial to avoiding future misunderstandings.

​​Children and parenting​
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​​Children and parenting​


Deciding whether or not to have children is a major choice that requires mutual agreement. Couples should discuss their desires regarding having children, including the timing and number of kids they envision. If both partners want children, it’s also important to talk about parenting styles and how responsibilities will be shared.

​​Household duties​
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​​Household duties​


Managing a household involves various tasks, from cooking and cleaning to paying bills and maintaining the home. Discuss how these duties will be divided to ensure both partners feel the arrangement is fair and balanced.

​​Living arrangements​
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​​Living arrangements​


Where you live can significantly affect your quality of life and happiness. Discuss your preferences for where you want to live—whether it’s in the city, suburbs, or countryside—and consider factors like proximity to work, family, and social activities. If you’re planning to move in together, talk about the type of home you want and how it will be maintained.

​​Family relationships​
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​​Family relationships​


Every family has its own dynamics, and marriage often means blending two families. Discuss how involved you want your families to be in your married life, how you will handle holidays and family gatherings, and how you plan to manage potential conflicts with in-laws.

​​Religious and cultural beliefs​
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​​Religious and cultural beliefs​


Religion and cultural background can play a significant role in a marriage. Couples should discuss their religious beliefs, cultural practices, and how these will be integrated into their married life. If you come from different backgrounds, talk about how you will celebrate holidays and raise your children in respect to these traditions.

Relationship expectations
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Relationship expectations

Many couples often fail to discuss their expectations early on in a relationship, assuming that everything will be perfect. However, when reality kicks in, this often leads them to disagreements and disappointments. And so, it is important to set your expectations right and discuss them early on in a relationship so that both the partners on the same page.

​​Health and wellness​
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​​Health and wellness​


Health is a crucial factor that can impact both partners. Discuss your current health status, any chronic conditions, and your attitudes toward health and fitness. It’s also important to talk about how you will support each other through sickness and health, and how you plan to manage healthcare decisions.

​​Handling conflicts​
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​​Handling conflicts​


No relationship is free of disagreements, but how conflicts are handled can make or break a marriage. Discuss how you plan to resolve conflicts, whether through open communication, counseling, or other methods. Understanding each other’s conflict resolution styles can help prevent small issues from escalating into bigger problems.

​​Future goals​
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​​Future goals​


Lastly, discuss your long-term goals as a couple. This includes your dreams for the future, such as buying a home, travelling, or retiring in a specific location. Aligning your long-term goals ensures that you’re both working toward the same vision for your future together.

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