Essential tips for building and maintaining a happy marriage

What is the secret of a happy marriage? What does it take to make a union between a man and woman, a joyful union? The secret is simple. It is when 1 + 1 does not become 2, when 1 + 1 does not become 11, but when 1 + 1 becomes 1, the battle is won.
So, how can this happen? How can there be a union of two people? As long as two people think they are two bodies, two minds, and two egos, there is bound to be a fight because each one will push with all their might.In the beginning, there may be much love, but unfortunately, we do not know the true meaning of love. The acronym LOVE reveals that it is the Longing Of the soul, which is Very passionate, which creates an Ecstasy of joy. But this is only possible when we realise that we are not the body, mind and ego, we are divine souls. Every marriage is built on four pillars. A two-wheeler is unstable with only two wheels. A two-legged table can topple. A three-legged table is unstable just like a three-legged tricycle or auto. But a four-wheeled vehicle or a four-legged table is stable. Similarly, four pillars are what make a marriage a divine union.
What are the four pillars? The body, mind, heart and soul. The magic in a marriage is only possible with a physical, intellectual, emotional, and spiritual bond.
Unfortunately, what we have been taught in schools that makes us fools, is that a man needs physical love and a woman needs emotional love. And so, we think we have achieved a ‘Master’s in marriage’ by realising that the secret of a successful marriage is a combination of a physical and an emotional bond. But this doesn’t work. Look at a married couple who is having lunch or dinner, and you will find them looking at their watches to see how long it will take for their food to come.
If two people get bored of each other, how can a marriage work for life? How can there be a divine union? There must not only be a physical bond, which is important, and an emotional bond that fosters understanding but also an intellectual bond that makes two people talk and walk together through the journey of life.
But what is the magic that makes marriage a divine union? It is the fourth pillar, a spiritual bond. A spiritual bond is when two people realise that they are both divine souls. What is a soul? A soul is a Spark Of Unique Life. A soul is a divine manifestation. And when two people realise this, then they become real soulmates. And soulmates never fall apart.
When love is true, then there is no heartache and heartbreak, for when people leave, it means that there was no love and when there is true love, then people don't leave. In a world where divorce is rampant and separations in marriages are so common, a Divine union is attained by overcoming ignorance and realising the truth of what makes a marriage magical.
A marriage should not just be a contract because these contracts can be broken. A marriage must be a commitment. A marriage is an amalgamation of two Souls — two Souls become one. It is a relationship where there are no expectations and conditions, where love flows, where you don't tell each other, ‘I love you because I need you.’ Rather, you tell each other, ‘I need you because I love you.’
This is the key difference, because when somebody says, ‘I love you because I need you,’ what it means is that they don't love you, they only need you. But when somebody says, ‘I need you, because I love you,’ it means that they truly love you. That is why they need you. In today's world, marriages are not usually successful, but a divine union of two souls can make a marriage, as they say, a heavenly marriage, an eternal bond, a bond where there is true love that is bliss, not just a kiss.
So, let us work towards making eternal marriages, where a marriage is not built on contracts, but on true love, a bond of the body, mind, heart and soul. Then divine love will flow and make two, one.
Authored by: AiR- Atman in Ravi