After basic physiological requirements, a crucial need is a sense of safety and trust. For parents, understanding this concept is vital in raising children who feel secure. Trust in significant adults, such as parents and teachers, is foundational to this sense of safety. Here are 8 essential strategies to nurture your child’s sense of safety and trust:
Understand your child
Each child is unique, with distinct needs and thought processes.
Pay attention to any changes in your child's behavior, as signs of worry, stress, or fatigue can be subtle. By understanding your child’s normal behavior, you can better detect when something is amiss and address it promptly.
Follow a routine
Routines provide predictability, which helps children feel secure. Establish a consistent daily schedule for activities like meals, bedtime, and playtime. This predictability allows children to anticipate what comes next, fostering a sense of stability and trust. Ensure that routines are followed even on weekends to maintain consistency.
Acknowledge disappointments
According to Meghna Yadav, child psychologist and parenting coach, KLAY preschools and daycare, “When children appear quieter than usual, engage them in conversation. Use simple, direct language to communicate, as indirect methods may not be effective. Encourage open discussions about their feelings to build trust. This practice helps children feel supported and more willing to share their concerns with you.”
Walk the talk
Children learn by observing. Model the behaviors you wish to instill in them. For example, if you want your child to wash their hands after play, do so yourself. Demonstrating the behaviors you want to see builds respect and trust, showing children that actions speak louder than words.
Empower your child
Equip your child with self-defense skills across physical, cognitive, social, and emotional domains. Teach them about good and bad touches, how to engage in self-play, make friends, and manage emotions. This empowers children to handle various situations independently and enhances their overall sense of security.
Check your boundaries
Strive to balance protection with autonomy. Overprotecting children can hinder their ability to manage daily stress and lead to dependency. Allow them to navigate challenges and learn from their experiences, fostering resilience and self-reliance while maintaining a supportive presence
Build resilience
According to Shreya Malik, lead clinical psychologist, Lissun, “Mistakes are excellent teachers! Give your kids the freedom to make errors and grow from them. Continue to demonstrate by your actions that "I am here for you, but be prepared to face life's challenges on your own." When parents use this strategy, children not only become more resilient but also feel more assured of their own abilities. It is important to remember to develop "digital resilience" in the tech-driven world of today. Discuss "screen-time" rather than just "screen." In order to help kids become resilient and learn to check themselves, screen time should always be restricted.”
Invest in yourself
According to the study, it is revealed that secure attachment and age are important factors in children's understanding of emotions, particularly negative emotions. Specifically, while both secure attachment and age contribute to a child's overall emotional understanding, secure attachment is especially significant for grasping negative emotions such as sadness, but not as much for positive emotions like happiness. To effectively care for your child, prioritize your own well-being. Maintain your physical and emotional health to stay energetic and positive. Self-care is crucial, as happy, healthy parents contribute to a secure and nurturing environment for their children.
Let us not forget the concept of “neuroception” while raising our children – a phenomenon which is constantly ticking below our subconscious and keeps scanning cues of safety or danger. The more the cues of safety and trust, the better will be the performance of the brain especially for executive functions. Children will achieve clarity on how to stay anchored in various walks of life only if we can offer an environment which is full of safety, security and trust!
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